Thursday, May 3, 2012

Alice in Wonderland

A Tim Burton rubbish, which hasn’t even got closed to the 1951 Walt Disney masterpiece.
I mean, we’d knocked around ourselves because Tim Burton was going to make a remake of this? Really, man? We had watched the trailers until our eyes became wet (Whoa! Hey, look man! How did she fall down the rabbit hole? Awesome stuff! It’d be great to watch
this in 3D. Whoa, man. This must be the best movie!). But what’s the result? Put some emotional scenes between the Mad Hatter and Alice, get some guys fought, then just say: “we’ve tried to put a meaning between those characters, who weren’t so meaningful.”
or something. Then, we shall just congratulate your idiotic script? Uncle Tim should listen to reason. But still, he recorded the movie in a great quality, so we were just like, whoa! Couldn’t say many words. Because the atmosphere and the costumes were such good stuff.
And yet those visual effects were great, it starts bothering you after a while. This guy’s Planet of the Apes version was also like this. I could at least watch that movie to the end but what’s the reason of this effort to swipe one of the greatest classical stories, which is Alice in Wonderland? Someone should explain this thing to me. Way before movie was not released yet, these guys were like: “I can suck Tim Burton’s ass, maaan!” and after the movie, nobody was talking about it. It was also funny.

Is there a scene in this movie that could race the tea party scene, which was from the 1951 Alice in Wonderland film? Is there any scene of yours in your cinematic history as hysterically edited as this scene? Who the hell are you, huh? (I’m fine, all right) I’ve got a chance to watch again the 1951 version in 1080p (it’s not like I’m so busy, I just like saying I’ve got the chance to watch and stuff), I one more time damned Tim Burton, dude. Have you seen such a bad script or editing before? Well, I could’ve said, he’s stuck with the book so he couldn’t reflect himself much, it’s alright but he’s screwed up the whole book as well. I had
gone to the cinema with lots of hope which were like, “I’m going to see a remark of Tim Burton about Alice in Wonderland” but what have I got in the end? A different story, which is created by Alice in Wonderland characters and lots of pointless dialogues. Alice in Wonderland’s point is pointless dialogues, all right but everything is a whole in that book. Example, Morpheus’ Alice in Wonderland references in the Matrix movie is a whole (and no doubt, they were purposely put in the movie) and Alice’s dialogues with the Cheshire Cat or Caterpillar were also logical in that concept. Those stuff are belong to that world. If you just throw those stuff away and create pointless dialogues instead, nobody’s gonna take you serious or go like, “Hmm, Good job Tim. You have fucked up this great classic very well, son!” That’s why, please stop remaking the classics, buddy! If Tarantino remade this movie, we could at least have a good editing but what we’re only able to say about Tim Burton’s movies, “costumes are great, man” or “this is so gothic, dude.”
I don’t know. I just think this movie is not capable of touching the 1951 version’s quality.

---- spoiler ----
cheshire cat: [singing] 'twas brilig, and the slithy toves / did gyre and gimble in the wabe:
/ all mimsy were the borogroves, / and the mome raths outgrabe.
alice: now where do you suppose...?
cheshire cat: lose something?
alice: [turns around to find just the cat's smile talking to her] oh my! oh, no no, i was just... uh
never mind.
cheshire cat: oh, that's quite all right. one moment please.
[two eyes drop down on top of the mouth and the full cat form appears]
cheshire cat: second chorus.
cheshire cat: 'twas brilig, and the slithy toves / did gyre and gimble in the wabe
alice: why, why you're a cat!
cheshire cat: a *cheshire* cat.
[starts to disappear]
cheshire cat: all mimsy were the borogroves...
alice: oh wait!
cheshire cat: [reappears] there you are! third chorus...
alice: oh, no, no. i was just wondering if you could help me find my way.
cheshire cat: well that depends on where you want to get to.
alice: oh, it really doesn't matter, as long as...
cheshire cat: then it really doesn't matter which way you go.
---- spoiler ----

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